This song goes right along with what the Lord revealed to me this week. PRAISE THE LORD that I AM NOT FORGOTTEN!

How has God shown himself to you this week?

The Lord had an awesome message for me this week, which came through my pastor Sunday morning. Pastor Jeff is preaching on "Giants" in our lives and the first one (in his series) is "INADEQUACY".
Boy that word just rang out in my ears for a good while before it actually clicked in my brain that THAT is what i've been dealing with over the last few months. Actually, if I want to be completely honest with myself, i've been wrestling with it all my life. Inadequacy is a hot button for the evil one. It is a weakness in me that goes straight to the core of my being and satan knows how to hit it & uses it to hurt me deeply.

I had never been able to put a name to what had been going on inside of me before. It was inadequacy - unworthyness. Finally, a word & a definition. It excited me to be able to finally unveil the one secret weapon, the Giant that satan had been hiding from me & using against me all this time.

Pastor Jeff's message said:
- The enemy wants to intimidate you and tell you that you can't win.
- If you embrace inadequacy you will welcome the mindset of unworthyness.
* Inadequacy, if not removed, will make you miserable.

Finally some truth's. I recognized those words as truths, because I had been living them. I had been miserable & felt unworthy. I felt like a spotlight was on me, because this message was written and specially delivered to me that morning. Almost as if the Lord himself was standing on that podium talking directly at me.

Then our pastor gave us 3 Truths to Remove Inadequacy:
1) Jesus Notices Me (give us attention)
- the deepest expression of love is attention!
**** STOP GAINING YOUR WORTH FROM OTHERS AND DEPEND ON GOD FOR YOUR WORTH!! ****

That one was like a sledgehammer to my chest. I felt all the air escape with that one. I have always tried to gain my worth through others. Whether it by my parents, friends, my singing talent, other mothers, the church - it was always someone or something else.

2) Jesus Lifts Me Up - Isaiah 49:16
3) Jesus Wants Me

After he finished the 3rd point my mind wondered off and I sat looking back over my notes. Here it is, in black & white, the ONE THING - THE GIANT that has caused me to feel unworthy, unloved and unnoticed all of my life. It was a Giant that was given to me by my family and I had accepted it and held onto if for dear life all of this time.

The Lord was saying see, here it is, here is what you have allowed to stand in between you and I. this is what you have held onto and have yet to give over to me. I want this burden, I want this Lie of inadequacy and unworthiness. Give it to me! You are of worth to ME, I Want You and I Need You. I have so many great things for you. You are the woman & mother I made you to be. You are loved, I LOVE YOU.

Tears began to well up in my eyes. And the flood gates were opened, I couldn't contain them anymore. I began to sob. It took all I had to keep it quiet. (because it was one of those deep in the stomach sobs where you gasp for air audibly. I had to put my hand over my mouth to keep the gasping from being heard through out the sanctuary.) It felt as if a weight had been lifted from my shoulders and the Lord knew and understood the load of shame and unworthiness that I had been carrying around on me all this time. He wanted it and I was happy to give it to Him. Because I didn't want this Giant to stand between us anymore. I didn't want satan to be able to use this weapon against me any longer.

It has been a long time coming, but now I feel armed & ready to be able to recognize this giant of inadequacy when the evil one tries to use it on me. I will seek after & go to the Lord for my worth, instead of other people or things. I know that I am of worth & value to Him and I know that I am loved and needed. I don't need to search for approval or attention from anyone else other than Him. Praise the Lord that He loves us so much that He takes the time to speak to us and reveal to us the area of our lives that cause us pain and those areas that we have yet to give fully over to Him. This is how the Lord spoke to me this week and I pray that it is an encouragement to you as well.

One of my favorite groups is "Selah". The Lord really speaks to me thru there music. I have blogged about one of there songs before & how it spoke to me - "I Bless your Name"
You can check that one out too. Watch the above video and let the Lord minister to you!

Word-Filled Wednesday

"If you return to the LORD, then your brother & children will be shown compassion by their captors and will come back to this land, for the LORD your God is gracious and compassionate. He will not turn his face from you if you return to him." ~2 Chronicles 30:9

WHY???

Why do we let the world / friends/ relationships/ other people dictate our happiness? I find myself doing it everyday. I allow it to happen daily. Why can't it be enough for us to depend on the one true thing that brings happiness, God? Why can't He be enough for our little human hearts & minds? I just don't understand it. Why do we make it so difficult? Why do we allow the evil one to have such control over us that we feel that we have to find happiness in other people or in worldly things? WHY??
Oh i get so frustrated when I look back and realize that I have allowed myself to rely on something/someone else for my happiness. It seems to take something going wrong with this thing or person to wake us up and see things in true light. Why does it take a duh moment to realize... ONLY THE LORD IS TRUE HAPPINESS & JOY!

How do we allow satan to put such a blindfold on us and not even realize that it's happening? I just don't understand it. It frustrates me more than anything to know that I have allowed the blindfold to be put on me to begin with. UGH!

Praise the Lord that he is so patient with us. There is a reason we are referred to as sheep, because sometimes we are just sooo stupid! If it weren't for the grace of God, we'd be wondering around lost and condemned to live without him forever. BUT HIS GRACE IS SUFFICIENT FOR ME/You/ US!
"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." ~2 Corin 12:9

"And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. " ~ Romans 12:2

Resistance is Futile

Okay so do you wanna know when you've been around teenagers WAY TOO MUCH? Well when your hubby says the word "Chillax" and "Fr'ill" in a sentence without skipping a beat and means it!

Uh yeah, my husband used both of these words today and it FREAKED ME OUT. I asked him to explain this new terminology/vocabulary use of his and he, with a strait face, said, "Chillax, you know Chill & Relax put together!" I about passed out in the front seat of the car. I couldn't believe it. He said, "It's slang" SLANG?? That isn't slang, that's lazyness for convenience sake.

My husband is a theatre arts teacher for a middle school and wouldn't you know it, it seems the kiddos are teaching him as well. I know that teachers want to relate to the students, but WOW! I hope this isn't a case of the Borg from Star Trek and he's been assimilated! Haa, haa! Cause you know, Resistance is Futile!! :D

Looking to Improve your blog page?

Well look no further.....

As you may have noticed, I have changed my blog template. Although the previous template was more my style or more "ME", it was not easy on the eyes at all. Frankly, I couldn't stand to look at it.. hahaha! While playing around online today and looking up blog templates, I just happened to stumble upon an AWESOME blog page... Split Decisionz. This page gives you a ton of tips and tricks on how to customize and/or create your own blog page. I have spent the last several hours on this page reading & trying out different things to improve my page. And the "new look" that my page has right now, is a free template that I am using for the time being until I learn how to do more and be able to create my own page.

So THANK YOU Amy at Split Decisionz for all your hard work and VERY helpful tutorials and tips you put on your page! Much Appreciated!

**Please go check her page out & tell her Groovewoman sent ya! **

Gem from LPM blog

In my readings today of the archived blogs on the LPM blog page, i found a fun little gem that I wanted to share with you. All thanks & kudos to Beth Moore & the other Siesta's who are on the LPM blog page.

Here is Beth's blog called "Please More Spirit"
"Since some of you Sistas brought up the subject of PMS (after all, we are sistas and if sistas have anything at all, it's hormones), I feel compelled to tell you what I told a group recently. If you want to live those fretful days of evil principalities with any measure of victory, if, when the day of evil comes, you indeed want to stand, you have to get in your head that PMS means Please More Spirit! Need a reference? OK, how about John 3:34 - "for God gives the Spirit without limit"? (It's a good thing.) Need another? Luke 11:13 - "how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?" You know how furious we get when one of our loved ones makes the merest suggestion that maybe we're a little hormonal? Like those times when waking up to an open bag of Fritos on the coffee table and a water ring left from a sweating glass of soda seem perfectly legitimate grounds for divorce? If, while we're denying the remotest chance we could have PMS, we start looking for the nearest thing we could throw at them, we might want to see these words flashing in red florescent lights across the marque of our minds: Please More Spirit! Please More Spirit! This morning Keith drew my attention to a darling 12 year old girl at church with that look on her face and said, "I hope her parents are really keeping an eye on her. She really seems sullen." "Honey," I said, "All 12 year old girls are sullen. They are a hormone waiting to wreak havoc." How could he have forgotten? Between his three women - Amanda, Melissa, and me - his skin was in jeopardy the greater part of any given month. But don't think he wasn't the kind to invite trouble. He'd say stuff like, "I'm so sorry, Baby. That zit really looks like it hurts." Where's me a lamp?? Good thing we have God. That's all I'm saying. And good thing for THEM we have God. Next time around, remember two very important things:
1. Pray "Please More Spirit!"
2. Take Your Midol. "
-Beth Moore

Here are some other acronyms for PMS supplied as comments from other Siesta's on LPM blog:
Personal Mission Statement - via abby
Poor Motivation Syndrome
Pamper Me Sweety
Pardon My Stupidity
Pepperoni, Mushroom, and Sausage
Psychotic Man Slayers
Pack My Suitcase
Provide More Starbucks
Purchase More Shoes
Pass My Shotgun
Pardon My Sobbing - via Connie B.
Perpetual Munching Spree - via shelly
Please More Snickers - via BigMama **my fav**

I hope you get a nice little giggle out of these today, cause I know that I DID!
And remember... "Please More Spirit"

Shackles

I was on Siesta Fiesta blog page... a page to keep you abreast of the latest info on the Beth Moore Siesta Fiesta Conference that is taking place in August..... anyway, they posted this video of Mary-Mary singing Shackles and i wanted to share this video/song with you.

This is SUCH a prayer of mine right now. I am looking for the Shackles to be taken off in my own life so i can praise our Heavenly Father! ENJOY!

Beth Moore

I absolutely love Beth Moore. If you aren't familiar with her, you need to be, because She is the most annointed christian woman that I have ever had the priveledge to know. She teaches so clearly from the Word of God. She has the ability to make scripture real and understandable, which at times you all know can be tricky. Beth opens her mouth and the Holy Spirit falls. I see her as my christian mentor. I want to be as on fire for Christ and as sure of the Lord's promises, truths and love for us as she does & as she teaches. I guess you could say at times, that I pray that I can be like her. I want to have the spiritual hotline connection to the Holy Father that she seems to have. Sometimes in her bible studies... on the video... you can almost see her having a mental conversation (or chuckle) with God right in front of you before she even opens her mouth to speak! She is just so intune with Him. I WANT THAT! I want to be joyous in the little delights of life... in the little things that the Lord is doing in others lives or the world around me. I WANT THAT! As I said, she is my mentor and she doesn't even know it. We've never met and I've never contacted her, but she is helping to lead me to the throne of Christ and to understand just how important God's Word truly is for an intimate relationship with Christ.

I recently found out that her ministry - Living Proof Ministries - has a blog page. Beth and her two daughters, have created a community for Christian women to come and connect and minister to one another. A place for christian sisterhood or Siesta-hood rather! :D And of course it has all the southern texas quirkyness that Beth is known for. She cracks me up in true texas southern woman fashion. She is HILARIOUS!

So, if you get a chance, check out the blog page (or her ministry site) and get ready for a holy uplifting of your spirit. It's like a holy giggle to the soul, you just walk away smiling and feeling all warm & fuzzy!

pic of Beth Moore

(you can find the link to LPM blog page in the side bar under links)

My Blog - Time for a Facelift!

Okay, I am ready to take this blog into the direction that i started it in, I got off course there for a while because I was more concerned in getting people to read the darn thing than in the quality or topics that i wrote about. I wouldn't read my blog, its rather boring and if you didn't know me personally, you wouldn't care that i colored my hair pink or that we went to Scarborough Faire on mother's day weekend. Yes, i should talk about the things going on in my life, but just not THINGS, but what The LORD is doing in my life and in my families life. It should be fun and uplifting, should be a place where other Christian women come to talk, laugh, and relate to the things of motherhood, womanhood and Christly sisterhood! ya know! (Now this sound serious... like a serious blog) Ughh, I just can't find the right rhythm here... this blog post feels very uncomfortable to me. Like i can't quite find the right words to actually say what i am trying to say......IRRITATING!! **in a singsong tone**

Okay - RETRY HERE!

I want a fun & uplifting, enjoyable, yet real, testament to life as a Christian woman, wife and mother. THERE...... that's it!